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I Saw Your True Feelings

by Baycun

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    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of I'll Sing With You, I Saw Your True Feelings, The Shape of Faith to Come, Finite Daydrudge (Anastasis Tape II), Tourist, Yass Pills / Chronically Online, Love Bots, Diffe (Remastered), and 218 more. , and , .

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    layout by Dozzyrok, booklets by M3 Printing

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1.
Overflow 00:11
2.
Find You 06:26
I lie awake every single night Wondering if what I did was right Did I get too close Or was this the kind of thing that you usually get from others I haven't been back there since then And I wonder if it's changed much Or if all that's changed Is the bond I broke we had I tried to find you somewhere in my mind But all the bits and pieces lie broken and discarded by my side It is just too late I wish I'd stopped time For your sake and for mine, I wish I'd stopped time All the bits and pieces (x2) Discarded by All the bits and pieces (x2) Discarded by You usually get, you usually get (x2) Get from others You usually get, you usually get (x2) Get from others I tried to find you in my mind I tried to see if I could stop time But it was too late for us to rewind So I just confined myself for all time Pull yourself together! Listen to you, why me, why me, you're always hiding behind other people! I tried to find you I tried to stop time (x6) I tried to, tried to, tried to find you I tried to (I tried to find you) I tried to stop time I tried to find you
3.
Swpl 02:58
4.
My Dimension 03:26
Crystals forming, paralyzed I'm choking now, I lost my sight You tell me why it's always night When something evil seizes might I never asked for answers But blood is on the moon And now a blackened dancer Creates their own cocoon I see it all through beady eyes The sun, and skin, and torched red skies I think it strange that you can't find That very soon the end is nigh End is nigh (x4) Four white walls Closing in Paper dolls Porcelain skin Always anxious I tried and tried To silence the demons The end is nigh End. Is. Nigh. In my dimension darkness tries A sacred rite and tries to buy Your full attention with its eyes And take your mind and seize your life I tried to save the living I tried and tried and tried But it was all in vain Because the end was nigh! (Four white walls Closing in Paper dolls Porcelain skin) (x2)
5.
Interlude 01:55
6.
Side to Side 05:08
Dear diary, I'm afraid I'm gravely ill It is perhaps times like these that one reflects on things past An article of clothing from when I was young A green jacket, a walk with my father, a game we once played Pretend we're fairies, I'm a girl fairie, my name is Laura Lee And you're a boy fairie, your name is Tita Lee Pretend when we're fairies we fight each other, and I say "Stop hitting me, or I'll die!" And you hit me again and I say, "Now I have to die." And then you say, "But I'll miss you." | And I say, "But I have to. And you'll have to wait a million years to see me again And I'll be put in a box, and all I'll need is a tiny glass of water and lots of tiny pieces of pizza And the box will have wings like an airplane." And you'll ask, "Where will it take you?" "Home." You were so precocious And out of your depth Remember what you said to me After they all left? I never forgot The glances you gave And look at me deceiving myself That your soul was mine to save Side to side to side to side (x2) You can't hide, no, you can't hide Side to side to side to side (x2) Don't even try Side to side to side to side (x2) You can't hide, no, you can't hide Side to side to side to side (x2) Do you trust me with your life? And I keep watching you across the floor I just can't stop I want it more and more Why does it always seem that You and me can't settle the score? I'm tired of your questioning You cut down too easily I don't know what's good for me I'll let you decide (Side to side!) Side to side to side to side (x2) You can't hide, no, you can't hide Side to side to side to side (x2) Don't even try Side to side to side to side (x2) You can't hide, no, you can't hide Side to side to side to side (x2) Do you trust me with your life?
7.
8.
(Verse 1: BRADOIS) Got the confidence of Tyler I ain't made it yet Catch me outside Fellini's with a slice and a cigarette Tell me who the best is, show me what the top do Y'all be making wack shit but I'll be there to stop you Wake up on the moon to sleep at six feet under Problems easy to ignore when you don't hear the thunder Life is crashing all around me and I can't seem to stop it Everybody checkin' in and I'm like "Bitch, drop it, yo!" Flying down the freeway with the key to a player Don't know who to put my trust in, all this fucking, all this shame And every time I talk about it, leave 'em all so scared Broken down so many friendships ain't no coming back repaired Who can you confide in when your best friend's attention? I am always self-absorbed, I cannot stop my condescension When I'm earnest, kind've genuine, I get this apprehension They will use this shit against me, I don't see a clear dimension Where I'm happy on my own, that's why I need the fucking tension Looking out for everybody, no one looking out for me Isolation, desperation, grief is all I fuckin' see If I were happy with myself, then I'd feel like I was free Everyone be kinder to yourselves and that's my final plea (Verse 2: Dozzyrok) Speakin' of, the world's weight I got a date, don't you fucking tell me otherwise It's with my self, not someone else Slide the fuckin' guy to me just what you waiting for Well I've took a lot of bullshit all throughout this fuckin' life Saying everything things behind me, we know that's a fuckin' lie I've been doing all this thinking, always thinking always thinking Thinking looking where the fuck am I now? Fuck! Goin' a million miles an hour, my brain is tired I'm treating myself with self-respect, we all know that But there's nothing that I know how to do That uses actions, words, or we are sticks and stones Break my bones and hold my heart up (Don't you ever) Hold my heart up! (Talk to me) Hold my heart up! (I don't ever) Hold my heart up! (Want to be seen) Hold my heart up! (Verse 3: Baycun) I deluded and secluded myself, inside an empty shell Of what we had together, before, you turned my whole life into hell Does that ring a bell? Do you remember now? Do you think I can stay forever in this waking cell? I wanna see you bleed open wounds and look at me I wanna love you endlessly and have you next to me I wanna control every aspect of your life and see if That will finally become the thing that makes me happy And you're my puppet in my mind and in my mind's eye I can find A perfect world that is all mine I mean just ours and that's just fine, I don't know what I can say, To make you stay (Beat Switch: BRADOIS) Flying down the freeway with the key to a player Don't know who to put my trust in, all this fucking, all this shame And every time I talk about it, leave 'em all so scared Broken down so many friendships ain't no coming back repaired
9.
Farwell 01:50
This world was built to last But now it's fading fast This world is all I have Don't take away my past (x3) This world was built to last This world was built to last But now it's fading fast This world is all I have Don't take away my past
10.

about

FOR DIGITAL DOWNLOADS, CLICK HERE:
baycun.bandcamp.com/album/i-saw-your-true-feelings
baycun.bandcamp.com/album/i-saw-your-true-feelings
baycun.bandcamp.com/album/i-saw-your-true-feelings
baycun.bandcamp.com/album/i-saw-your-true-feelings
baycun.bandcamp.com/album/i-saw-your-true-feelings

"This album was conceptualized in late April of 2021 and finished September of that same year, most of the ideas for it compositionally and conceptually be catalyzed by rewatching one of my favorite animes, Alien 9, with a close friend in person. The earliest started tracks were all the ones centered around samples from the show's wonderful score, and in general I felt as though the album began to take more concrete shape once I began to relate it to a theme that that show shares, with a lot of my favorite media that is also sampled throughout the record, of trying to chase an idealized permanent fantasy and "keep the dream alive" of something, long after the moment has passed and the impermanence of everything in life has robbed you of what you felt was perfect in that now past time. When that theme popped up lyrically while writing Find You, I felt it fitting to see it through to incorporate it as much as possible in all the other lyrics I wrote. I think whatever we experience in life, whatever positive, important imprints are made upon us as we perpetually move forward, the things that made me feel more alive in certain moments than I do normally are what keep me tethered to wanting to continue to move forward. So I guess that's what this whole thing is about: recognizing the futility of wanting that, calling it impossible, and chasing that dream anyways."

credits

released July 9, 2022

Production on all tracks, vocals on 2, 4, 6, 8, and 9, by Baycun. Vocals on track 8 by BRADOIS. Production on track 7, vocals on track 8 by Dozzyrok.


Sample on track 1 from FLCL. Samples on tracks 2, 8, and 9 from Alien 9 OVA, composed by Kuniaki Haishima. Sample on track 4 from Sonic Shuffle OST, composed by Ryo Fukuda. Samples on tracks 6 and 10 from Synecdoche, New York. Sample on track 6 from Castles in the Sky by Ian van Dahl. Sample on track 7 from What It Is by Busta Rhymes. Sample on track 7 from Magoo Opening by Cornelius. Sample on track 8 from Night on the Galactic Railroad.

Baycun:
baycun.bandcamp.com
soundcloud.com/baycunn
twitter.com/Baycunn

Dozzyrok:
twitter.com/ddozzyrok
youtube.com/user/AustRock9080

BRADOIS:
linktr.ee/bradois

~CBR~158

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2015-2022

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